Wanna play a game?
Okay, you’re at bookclub or sitting on the soccer sidelines or waiting at the bus stop. Ask your mom-friends who they used to be before kids. And be prepared to be wowed.
A pathologist. Photographer. Outward bound leader. Psych Nurse. Chef. IT professor. Nanny. Pharmacist. Sports trainer. Novelist. Bartender. HR specialist. Ophthalmologist. Horse trainer. Financial consultant. Editor. Rabbi. Peace corp volunteer. Construction buyer. Para-legal.
Really. These are just some of the people I see every day and didn’t have a clue to their pre-kid lives, because frankly, I didn’t care to ask. But now that I’m back at work, even part-time, I’m intrigued by all the careers and jobs held by my friends in their past. How bizarre it is I know intimate details about their lives, but not this vital link. It shows how focused we are on our children, but also how quickly we as women seem to evaporate.
Our lives before kids seem silly and insignificant when you’re neck deep in kid-crises: temper tantrums, car seats, unidentified rashes, driving lessons, and the benefits of tampons. But there will come a time when lives before kids will inspire, encourage and clearly show you the way to go back to work when you’re good and ready.
And you will be, perhaps not today, but someday. You will regain your identity and not forfeit the coveted mom crown, but instead wear it even more proudly when you realize there is another world out there that perhaps you forgot, but not to worry. It hasn’t forgotten you.
Go ahead, ask around. Who did you used to be? Who surprised you the most?
You absolutely need to stay connected, nice blog
Once again, I love your blog. This is the reason those of us with slightly younger kiddos refer to you behind your back and to your face as “the great OZ.” It’s not only the sex facts, teacher/cluster info, warnings, etc and hand-me-downs (or ups for us) that you share but the clever and witty insights you share on your blog. Thanks for sharing.
Michelle Saunderson says
I could have written this blog. I am so glad to have found someone else who understands my world.
Kathy (Return-to-Work Mom) says
Hey Michelle! You did write this blog… well, not you, but the collective you. The more I tell people I’m working, I find this longing look in their eyes… mostly from those w/kids too young for the mom to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But it’s there! Just remember who you were and the mom-thing will only accentuate the previous you. I get it. I really do.
You know, though– unless I get into my Dream Job, my job will be just that thing I do for money and to get out of the house. It won’t define me, because chances are that it won’t end up furthering a cause I really believe strongly in. For many people, both men and women, careers are a means to an end, rather than something that gives real insight to personality.
Kathy (p/t writer, f/t mom) says
I hear you Amanda! I work to buy bigger cleats for the kids… but as I sent my oldest to college, I realize this cleat-buying gig will also come in handy when I’m the last one here. At least give me some direction to what I want to — and not want to — do. Dream job, for me at this time, is the cleat/mom thing. May change in the future, but definitely a means to an end! thx for comment