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I recently got slammed for my Abercrombie blog, for being “misogynist” and “slut-shaming little girls.” Ouch. Not exactly, my interpretation, but apparently I incited some angry feminist Abercrombie shoppers.
They call it trolling in the blog-world. And while I’d like to be all bad ass about it, it freaked me out. A lot.
Like 7th grade lunch room freak out when the popular girls all wear overalls and I’m still wearing purple toughskins with reinforced knees and suddenly realize not only am I not-cool, but I’ve broken some rule and there’s hell to be paid.
But here’s the difference: people out there have got my back. Invisible people. I’m their cyber groupie: reading their words, laughing at their tweets without them even knowing I exist. Which is creepy, but that’s what we do here: creep, until we make ourselves known.
I put it out there, not knowing what to expect. I reached out to the anonymous world of bloggers and tweeters and these pros came to my aid. Immediately.
A big hug to blogging, writing, social media geniuses All Pretty True and Life with the Campbells and Uppercase Woman. If you don’t read them, you should.
They pretty much told me like it is: real world advice I preach to my kids about internet use, but failed to implement myself. My bad.
- Remove ability to post anonymously. People will be far nicer when they have to own their words.
- Find your voice and make no apologies.
- Not everyone is going to love you. Dissent is okay; hate and personal attacks are not.
- Don’t ever let blog commenters know your address, email, or phone number. Those who hate you will relentlessly torment you. Create new email solely for blog correspondence.
- Ask for help. Bloggers are friendly, inherently helpful and authentic. There’s room for all, with endless possibilities.
- Decide whether to keep or remove the comments. (I’m deleting, as soon I figure out how; while I love dissent, I hate hate.)
So this is why you can’t post anonymously. Make an account. And while I’m not screening comments before they’re posted, I am kicking out the party crashers. Because this blog is my party, and now I’m wearing the overalls.
I guess that you can consider the trolls as a backhanded compliment… the blog is getting more well known! Congrats for writing well enough for people to troll!
Sorry, but I am laughing at your expense. I think it is funny how people get so bent out of shape. Girl, you wear those overalls well!!!!
Ok this is a HATE comment..I hate it when trolls rain on my friends’ blog parties and even on non-friends’ blogs who think like me. They should be hung by their pointy little shoes. BTW, I had those same purple toughskins. Owe it to a friend who rescued me & let me borrow her white lee overalls (indefinitely) in 7th grade – wow, I was so cool!
Stellar recovery. Rock on!
Between the uber-Christian mommy blogs and the general red-state ones–I am sort of happy to hear there are some militant feminist bloggers. Too bad that are too sissy to leave their names. Those candy-ass little girls.
You kick ass in you tough-skins!
Hey lazymom (oxymoron?) cuz what you describe is my, um, family and apparently from the last election, my town for the most part. But of all the women bashing, misogynist targets out there, they choose…me? appreciate your target and LOVE “candy-ass little girls!”
You have arrived when the trolls find you…I think? Finding and owning your voice is key in blogging, yours comes through loud and clear. Good on ya! 🙂
The problem with laying out the feminist card on any issue is there are too many different types of feminists to ever get concensus on anything.
Great tips for virgin bloggers; it shows everyone you are moving forward. Keep up the good posts and passionate opinions!
Not anonymous the name is Jennifer. 🙂
JENNIFER! youdabestest, woman. Thanks!
I just started stalking you. But I am far from anonymous. Please, feel free to stalk me back. I need attention.
thx for the comment BeaDandelion — appreciate the friendly stalking!