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Kathryn Mayer • Writing Out Loud

I write stuff down. writer • humorist • activist

I Will Not Complain About Driving. I Will Not Complain About Driving. I Will Not Complain.

April 12, 2011 by Kate Mayer 9 Comments

Where have I been?

Driving. And driving and driving.

I work until 3, 3:30 sometimes 4:00 if I’m not watching the clock, then get in the car to drive my kids.

And the neighbor’s.

And other kids, vaguely familiar from preschool a decade ago, hanging out whose moms “work” and since I’m home, can I swing them home? On the other side of the Ponderosa. And it’s a big motherf’ing Ponderosa, my rural town is.

All you young moms who want a big family?

May want to rethink that.

Because if all goes well, they grow.

And want to do things.

Like soccer and plays and student gov and skateboard and lifeguard and get extra help and hurdles and horses and pottery and lacrosse and scouts and motorcross and reffing and SATs and mentoring.

How I drive: around and ’round and ’round.

And if you don’t want them addicted to heroin, or pregnant, or at war in someone’s video pit, or hanging out at Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot with 23 year-olds, you need to get them there.

Which is why last week I put 470 miles on my car. Or rather, my boss’s car. But that’s another blog.

My rather attractive husband was out tapping trees, my carpooling firefighter neighbor was working nights, and my 16 year old has yet to get her license.

And fields opened. Which meant games. Lots of them. Some zip codes away, some across town.

470 miles which concludes, of course, that rather attractive husband does a lot more driving than I give him credit for. But that too, is another blog.

470 miles of spirographing: to school, to practice, to the pool. To the library, to home. Back to a locker then Target. To the doctor, then field. To a game, to the orthodontist – seldom over 40 mph, rarely out of a 6 mile radius. All between 3:45 and 7. Or 8. Or 9:00 pm. Not all nights. But many.

And this is on top of my regular work, gas, groceries, work, vet, gas, and um, gas. And an occasional drive through previously mentioned Dunkin’Donuts parking lot.

When kid1, college girl, was entering high school, I listened to a panel of current 9th graders speak to incoming freshman parents. One kid spoke from the heart, and not a script. I’m sure the administration was standing nearby with a hook, but that kid’s words echo in my ears even today.

“Listen: don’t pressure your kids to get involved

then bitch and complain about having to take us places.

You have no idea how much that just sucks for us.”

Ouch.

So I drive: traveled this past week 470 miles with the windows down and music cranked, knowing this road will end all too soon. And I will miss it.


I’m Not Talking about the Abercrombie Bikini and You Can’t Make Me
Thank You Randall: Honey Badger Now a Verb

Comments

  1. irishtwinsmommababybook says

    April 12, 2011 at 4:18 pm

    I think you need to repost that “
    All you young moms who want a big family?” because we are dumbasses in the begining thinking we want that. And honestly, in my case, even though I cannot have anymore due to possibly not dying with the third, I couldn’t handle it.

    We soon find out. Plus all of that stuff! I swear– you are my support for what is to come without all of that “yeah, you’re going to be in trouble with two teenager girls so close together” and blah, blah, blah. 😉

    Reply
  2. Kathy (p/t writer, f/t mom) says

    April 12, 2011 at 4:50 pm

    don’t die.
    that would so not be good for those little girls waiting to grow up and torment you. Parenting is such beautiful pain. It’s what we signed up for. (Dontcha just luv it – most days?!?!)

    Reply
  3. Naila Moon of the Grey Wolf says

    April 15, 2011 at 12:13 am

    I am now Grandma and I am still driving and driving and….
    I feel your pain! lol
    Found you from Java’s.
    ~Peace….Naila Moon

    http://imaphotographicgenius.blogspot.com/2011/04/wordless-wednesdaynew-driver.html

    Reply
  4. Giggle, Laugh, Cry says

    April 15, 2011 at 1:26 pm

    Hi, I stopped by from the Follow Friday. New follower. Please visit my blog too if you like: gigglelaughcry.blogspot.com

    Reply
  5. Robin K says

    April 15, 2011 at 9:10 pm

    I am Go-to Mom. Some of the best times and conversations happen while carpooling!

    Love reading about your big fam. way to keep it rockin’ and rolllin’. Did I just say that out loud?

    Reply
  6. LazyMom says

    April 16, 2011 at 1:02 pm

    Please…I commute into NYC everyday via car and I feel that is a breeze compared to dragging The Beast and her friends to all those little activities, events, parties etc. down our quaint little winding tree line streets… But I do agree with Robin K–you hear a lot of inside stories while driving a car full of kids around.

    Reply
  7. Kathy (p/t writer, f/t mom) says

    April 16, 2011 at 1:29 pm

    absolutely: that’s when I give the sex talk in detail to trapped ears and minds.

    Reply
  8. Kathy (p/t writer, f/t mom) says

    April 16, 2011 at 1:31 pm

    @Robin K — rockin’ and rollin’? for real? yep, you said it!

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. The Drive Before the Storm - Kathryn Mayer says:
    January 30, 2015 at 3:51 am

    […] so now I must pick up kid3 without complaining because that would ruin her drive and make me into the kind of mom I promised I wouldn’t be EV-AH, but puh-leeze, […]

    Reply

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About Kathryn Mayer

Kathryn Mayer

An irreverent storyteller with a foul mouth and big heart, Kathryn Mayer (aka Kathy and/or Kate) is a writer, humorist, and (former) activist writing out loud with humor and grace about little life moments with big ripples, including the space between parenting and aging parents, social issues, angsty reflections of midlife, and, sigh, gun humpers. Still. Sometimes a big deal, sometimes not Mayer is a national award-winning columnist, according to the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, and her essays have been recognized as Voice of … Read More Here...

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