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| Irene took all the C & D batteries in America. |
Since I work at home, you know, “part-time”, I took it upon myself to prep the fam for the upcoming visit from Hurricane Irene. After rather attractive husband said, exasperated that he stopped at 3 stores that were sold out on his way to a real job.
I figured he was lying.
I do not take this lightly, as I under no uncertain terms want to be stuck in a house with teenagers and tweenager, no power, no food, and no flush toilets.
Not for one hour, let alone a week or quite possibly longer.
This is serious shit, pun clearly intended.
So I set out this morning to pick up C and D batteries for flashlights that have been abandoned in a treehouse since everyone was in car seats, gas up the car, and load up the red tanky thingy for the chainsaw, and perhaps buy a bottle of wine or six.
First stop: batteries. Nope. None at Mobil, Hardware, Target, grocery stores (3), CVS (2), Walgreens (1).
Apparently rather attractive husband was not lying.
The whole work at home thing is clearly not working so good today.
Zero billable hours, and zero batteries.
Add the battery search into kid2 is lifeguarding all day and unable for rides so now I must pick up kid3 without complaining because that would ruin her drive and make me into the kind of mom I promised I wouldn’t be EV-AH, but puh-leeze, oh-my-god-why-won’t-school-start-already:
11:00 swim pick up
12:00 train drop off for favorite South Bronx Puerto Rican too dumb to stay in the suburbs for the hurricane.
1:30 hair for incoming freshman
2:00 pick up fancy new $35 dollar haircut kid3
3:30 swim practice <—— I AM HERE NOW
4:30 swim pick-up
6:00 soccer practice
8:00 soccer pick up
And during this venture, you know I stopped at every Tom, Dick & Harry (does anyone say that anymore?) bodega (not common in suburbia, but you’s know what I mean) to find shelf after shelf of no C or D batteries.
I’m exhausted. And did nothing, absolutely nothing, all day.
Plenty of batteries at our local hardware. Too dumb? I’m chalking it up to clairvoyance but still got some. Also? My mom just called to tell me to fill the bathtubs with water in case we needed it to flush toilets! Serious shit indeed.
What it be wrong to take the C batteries out of my vibrator in case of emergency? Whoops, did I say that out loud?
It absolutely occurred to me that the run on batteries had nothing whatsoever to do with the hurricane, except that women all over Northeast would be trapped inside with “nothing” to occupy their time & hands!