Boy came got off the bus really, really happy, which hasn’t been the case all year since apparently the 7th grade girls, or at least two of them, have decided he’s cute.
Really, really cute.
Boy has been riding the bus to middle school for about a month now, a 6:27 am bus ride that the older, hairier high school kids insist be silent, because well, duh, it’s 6:30 in the frickin’ morning and these kids are tired.
But that doesn’t stop two bubbly, very awake 7th grade girls from constantly babbling for the whole bus to hear, their undying affection for um, my kid.
Apparently my boy is a chick magnet. Whudda thunk it?
It’s relentless, I swear. Every day, a different story. It’s How the World Turns, middle school edition.
Boy, I assure you, wants nothing to do with sparkly lip glossed girls, but he is very intrigued with the curly hair boy who plays lacrosse on the high school team and has the coolest sneakers EVER. “I mean like ever, Mom. They’re the coolest EVER.”
But sparkly lip gloss?
Not so much.
Enter Kid3 to the rescue. There’s nothing like an ex-7th grade girl, now a lurking, somewhat gorgeous but I may be a tad biased, 5’10 honest-to-goodness HIGH SCHOOL girl to put on a cape and rescue her little brother.
Makes my heart all a’flutter. Look Rather Attractive Husband – they don’t hate each other!
So when Kid3 was forced to ride the bus instead of being chauffeured by Kid2, (I’m-too-cool-to-take-the-bus-because-I’m-a-senior-even-though-gas-is-$4-a-gallon-and-I-drive-an-8-cylinder-pick-up), big little sister sprang into action.
Setting: Crowded school bus filled with grades 7-12. Last stop, completely jammed bus. Budget yo’. Sophomore Kid3 is in the way back. In front of her, Sparkling Lip Gloss Girl Emma and Freckly Friend. Couple seats ahead, Boy squeezed in with Curly Hair High School Lacrosse Playing BoyMan.
Freckled Friend: “Therrrreeee he isssss! Your boyyyyyfriend Boy! He’s soooooooo cute, doncha just think he’s cuuuuute? Doncha wish you could sit with him?”
Sparkly Lip Gloss Girl: “Ooooooh! Boy’s on the bus! Yaaayyy! Oooooh, Hiiiiiiiiii Boyyyyy. Hiiiiii!
Freckled Friend: “Emma likes you Boooyyyyyy. She reeeeeealllllly likes you!”
Freckled Friend: “Emmma, are you wearing sparkly lip gloss? Are you wearing sparkly lip gloss for Booooyyyyy?”
Kid3: [leaning forward and folding her praying mantis frame up and over the seats, wedges her face nose-to-nose between the two teenybopper stalkers.
YOU GIRLS NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP. LIKE NOW.
Curly Hair High School Lacrosse BoyMan: [Looking straight ahead, elbows jabs Boy]
Hey. She your sister?
Curly Hair High School Lacrosse BoyMan: Thank her for me.