Today would have been my father’s 75th birthday. To honor him, I present here a partial list of Mike Mayer-isms, and encourage you to stick a finger in the cake at your next party. Colder than a witch’s tit in July. “Get your foot off the clutch!” Jesus H. Christ You’re a wart on the ass of progress. TURN. OFF. THE. LIGHTS. Humpin’ Jesus. Pay cash. Drive that car like it was made to
Gumby: Green Guy, Quite Stretchy
Occurred to me recently that perhaps return-to-work moms reading this who didn’t wait until their oldest was 17 to get a J-O-B may not exactly know who Gumby is. Makes me want to gag, but apparently, Gumby is not a household word any longer, but someone forgot to tell me. See, I’m old. I wasn’t aware of it, regardless of constant reminding from teen-offspring who say I’m not nearly as