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Kathryn Mayer • Writing Out Loud

I write stuff down. writer • humorist • activist

Condom Sense

April 7, 2015 by Kate Mayer 13 Comments

I have a Costco-sized box of condoms in our hall closet, opened, right up in front, with a handful removed so nobody’s counting or keeping track if any go missing. Easy access, no questions asked. Like mints, take one. Take two. Just take. I’d prefer these horny teenagers save it for someone who matters, someone who will love them inside and out, to their very core and soul, and not

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First Day of School Bus Stop Joy

September 5, 2012 by Kate Mayer 11 Comments

School’s back in session, and thousands of iPhones are capturing the magic milestones as little back packs, shiny new shoes, and fancy lead-based lunch boxes climb that big yellow bus. Tiny little fists heroically wave goodbye to the parents left behind. And while tears are being shed, there are a few, brief moments of joy. Here’s mine:

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Summertime Daughter Grows Up

July 5, 2012 by Kate Mayer 20 Comments

I have a part-time daughter: a little girl from the South Bronx, who I’ve watched grow up from afar, taught how to read, camp, pick blueberries.  I taught her how to use a tampon, importance of birth control, and shoved the importance of school down her throat to escape the only world she ever knew. She’s started as a summer time daughter, turning 5 on the deadline date she climbed

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Pillow Pets & Guatemala

January 11, 2012 by Kate Mayer 14 Comments

My college kid is in Guatemala for January break trying to be immersed in the language and come home fluent. Yay her. It’s a January term project for which she receives college credit – if she lives and doesn’t end up sold into sex slavery or decapitated or heroin addicted or bound and gagged in a trunk of an old Dodge Dart. It’s just a thought, from her mom and

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Attainable parenting goals for the New Year

January 2, 2012 by Kate Mayer 4 Comments

Brand spanking new year and I am so ready to take it by the chinese wontons and work the hell out of it! Sorry, a bit too much Hangover quotes flying around this holiday season. Nothing says Christmas like your 17, 14 and 12 year old quoting The Hangover and equally inappropriate Step Brothers around the yule log. The 12 year old, Boy, hasn’t seen either; only the play-by-play human Tivo Kid3

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I programmed this fucker myself, thank you very mu I programmed this fucker myself, thank you very much. Trying to stave off the genetic inevitable -- link to story in bio.Also subscribe for more -- please! I lose subscribers every time I post (sooooo insulting!) and this one isn't even about guns or vaginas! Pretty soon it'll just be my mom reading me, unless she unsubscribes after this one.•#ageinplace #caregivers #humorwriting #midlife #agingparents #amwriting #cnf #memoirwriting #amblogging #gettingold #seniormoments #seniorcitizen #aarp #motherdaughter
Mask, vax & lax! First game spectators were allowe Mask, vax & lax! First game spectators were allowed at in over a year -- felt great to see my boy play in person! Plus jalapeno marg after — thx for the vaccine #moderna•#hoboken #stevensinstitute #d3mlax #drinkingwmyboy #spectators #socialdisdancing #gotech #smartfunnykind #littleegg #goboy  #lastegg
I’m so grateful & happy this sister of mine is c I’m so grateful & happy this sister of mine is celebrating another birthday! Happy birthday @jennifer.mayer.589 — wishing you much success  on the court and off!
Happy birthday plus a day to this grownass amazing Happy birthday plus a day to this grownass amazing woman.Spoiled for sure -- me, not her.  Never her, kid3. (Or him.) Just me, and super glad & grateful for it.•#grownandflown #proudmom #brooklynbrains #brooklynbeauty #offthepayroll #emptynest
Not dead yet. Thankfully. Most days. • #vaccin Not dead yet.Thankfully.Most days.•#vaccinated #mostly #upfromthegraveshearose #yesimeantSHE #sisterpower #missingsandra
Welcome back. Getting the blog back together. See Welcome back.Getting the blog back together. See you soon.•#writing #blogging #storytelling #getit? #willigetsuedforthis #welcomeback #backinthesaddleagain #cnf #essaywriting #wordsmatter #memoir #reallife #funnynotfunny #canyouhearmenow
It’s hard to keep up with the shooting hashtags. It’s hard to keep up with the shooting hashtags.We don't need to live(and die)like this.We really don't.•#guncontrolnow #endgunviolence #guncontrol #backgroundchecks #banweaponsofwar #onlyinamerica
“Who owns that baby?” • #signsofspring #lola “Who owns that baby?”•#signsofspring #lolasnewfriend #ididntstealthisbaby #neighbors #spring #viewfromnewtown #imtheoldladyonthestreet #gottabuyicepops
Can't you smell that smell? I have a really funny Can't you smell that smell?I have a really funny story about growing up and hating this🍀aroma but...now that restrictions are liftedwith white supremacy armed and at the ready,and mass shootings resumed,with Asians in the cross hairs,I'm just not feeling all that festive.•#stpatricksday #cornedbeefandcabbage #irish #homegrownterrorist #whitesupremacyisterrorism #hatecrime #misogyny #endgunviolence #disarmhate #stopasianhate
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About Kathryn Mayer

Kathryn Mayer

An irreverent storyteller with a foul mouth and big heart, Kathryn Mayer (aka Kathy and/or Kate) is a writer, humorist, and activist writing out loud with humor and grace about little life moments with big ripples, including the space between parenting and aging parents, social issues, angsty reflections of midlife, and, sigh, gun humpers. Still. Sometimes a big deal, sometimes not Mayer is a national award-winning columnist, according to the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, and her essays have been recognized as Voice of the Year … Read More Here...

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