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Kathryn Mayer • Writing Out Loud

I write stuff down. writer • humorist • activist

Vaguebook to a writer’s rescue

May 27, 2015 by Kate Mayer 9 Comments

is blogging writing?

Been struggling a bit with the writing. My writing. To do or not to do. Not with content, this is not writer’s block. I’ve got content believe me: everywhere I look life is screaming to be heard, stories aching to be told. Laughed at. Exposed. Teased, tormented, loved, shared. Told.

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Two guys in the back of a truck

April 14, 2015 by Kate Mayer 8 Comments

All this gay talk in DC with SCOTUS debating same sex marriage and POTUS calling for a ban on LGBTQ conversion therapy because well, that’s just freakishly barbaric. Whose idea was it anyway to convert those who are gay, lesbian, transgender and/or not-white-upper-country-club-class-heterosexual-congressmen type men into white-upper-country-club-class-heterosexual-congressmen type men? Why this barbaric practice exists in the first place is disgusting and shameful, clearly invented by white-upper-country-club-class-heterosexual-congressmen type men really, really afraid of something. Conversion

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Condom Sense

April 7, 2015 by Kate Mayer 13 Comments

I have a Costco-sized box of condoms in our hall closet, opened, right up in front, with a handful removed so nobody’s counting or keeping track if any go missing. Easy access, no questions asked. Like mints, take one. Take two. Just take. I’d prefer these horny teenagers save it for someone who matters, someone who will love them inside and out, to their very core and soul, and not

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Mike Mayerisms Grandpa Wisdom

March 18, 2015 by Kate Mayer 15 Comments

Today would have been my father’s 75th birthday. To honor him, I present here a partial list of Mike Mayer-isms, and encourage you to stick a finger in the cake at your next party. Colder than a witch’s tit in July. “Get your foot off the clutch!” Jesus H. Christ You’re a wart on the ass of progress. TURN. OFF. THE. LIGHTS. Humpin’ Jesus. Pay cash. Drive that car like it was made to

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When one door closes, another opens!

March 9, 2015 by Kate Mayer 1 Comment

As you know, I was denied, yet again, from Listen To Your Mother. This time in Boston. However as part of my ‘try, try and try again‘ resolutions for the new and improved me, I submitted my story to The Good Men Project where it happily found a home. The editor did ask me to re-record the video, without all the boo-hooing about being rejected. Please stop by and take a peak at

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How to call congress about anything

March 4, 2015 by Kate Mayer 3 Comments

GOOD NEWS!! Bipartisan federal legislation has been reintroduced for federal background checks on all gun sales, even those sneaky ones at gun shows, on the internet, and in the Pennysaver. (Am I dating myself? Or is Craigslist the new Pennysaver?) Either way, you want a firearm, you gotta pass a background check. Duh. Got a problem with that? Many paranoid patriots will, make no mistake about it: they’ll work like crazy to

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Balls & Baginas (& Sour Grapes)

March 2, 2015 by Kate Mayer 8 Comments

They love me, they love me not. Not talking about the kids, talking about the judges. And editors. And well, yeah. Had the New Year’s goal to submit, apply, audition, and not worry about acceptance … just keep writing … and it was all going so good, until the rejections started rolling in. My ego is ouching. After a successful debut in 2012, I am a Listen To Your Mother reject.

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Vaginas for dummies: when congress flunks human anatomy

February 26, 2015 by Kate Mayer 10 Comments

Looks like Idaho Rep. Vito Barbieri might be in need of my most infamous mom services. In particular, my sex-talk, this is how it works, here is the science and biology of the birds and the bees and everything in between. Because Representative Barbieri asked at a public hearing about telemedicine and specifically how it affects women’s reproductive healthcare. He asked a Dr. Julie Madsen, who was testifying in support

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I programmed this fucker myself, thank you very mu I programmed this fucker myself, thank you very much. Trying to stave off the genetic inevitable -- link to story in bio.Also subscribe for more -- please! I lose subscribers every time I post (sooooo insulting!) and this one isn't even about guns or vaginas! Pretty soon it'll just be my mom reading me, unless she unsubscribes after this one.•#ageinplace #caregivers #humorwriting #midlife #agingparents #amwriting #cnf #memoirwriting #amblogging #gettingold #seniormoments #seniorcitizen #aarp #motherdaughter
Mask, vax & lax! First game spectators were allowe Mask, vax & lax! First game spectators were allowed at in over a year -- felt great to see my boy play in person! Plus jalapeno marg after — thx for the vaccine #moderna•#hoboken #stevensinstitute #d3mlax #drinkingwmyboy #spectators #socialdisdancing #gotech #smartfunnykind #littleegg #goboy  #lastegg
I’m so grateful & happy this sister of mine is c I’m so grateful & happy this sister of mine is celebrating another birthday! Happy birthday @jennifer.mayer.589 — wishing you much success  on the court and off!
Happy birthday plus a day to this grownass amazing Happy birthday plus a day to this grownass amazing woman.Spoiled for sure -- me, not her.  Never her, kid3. (Or him.) Just me, and super glad & grateful for it.•#grownandflown #proudmom #brooklynbrains #brooklynbeauty #offthepayroll #emptynest
Not dead yet. Thankfully. Most days. • #vaccin Not dead yet.Thankfully.Most days.•#vaccinated #mostly #upfromthegraveshearose #yesimeantSHE #sisterpower #missingsandra
Welcome back. Getting the blog back together. See Welcome back.Getting the blog back together. See you soon.•#writing #blogging #storytelling #getit? #willigetsuedforthis #welcomeback #backinthesaddleagain #cnf #essaywriting #wordsmatter #memoir #reallife #funnynotfunny #canyouhearmenow
It’s hard to keep up with the shooting hashtags. It’s hard to keep up with the shooting hashtags.We don't need to live(and die)like this.We really don't.•#guncontrolnow #endgunviolence #guncontrol #backgroundchecks #banweaponsofwar #onlyinamerica
“Who owns that baby?” • #signsofspring #lola “Who owns that baby?”•#signsofspring #lolasnewfriend #ididntstealthisbaby #neighbors #spring #viewfromnewtown #imtheoldladyonthestreet #gottabuyicepops
Can't you smell that smell? I have a really funny Can't you smell that smell?I have a really funny story about growing up and hating this🍀aroma but...now that restrictions are liftedwith white supremacy armed and at the ready,and mass shootings resumed,with Asians in the cross hairs,I'm just not feeling all that festive.•#stpatricksday #cornedbeefandcabbage #irish #homegrownterrorist #whitesupremacyisterrorism #hatecrime #misogyny #endgunviolence #disarmhate #stopasianhate
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About Kathryn Mayer

Kathryn Mayer

An irreverent storyteller with a foul mouth and big heart, Kathryn Mayer (aka Kathy and/or Kate) is a writer, humorist, and activist writing out loud with humor and grace about little life moments with big ripples, including the space between parenting and aging parents, social issues, angsty reflections of midlife, and, sigh, gun humpers. Still. Sometimes a big deal, sometimes not Mayer is a national award-winning columnist, according to the National Society of Newspaper Columnists, and her essays have been recognized as Voice of the Year … Read More Here...

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